Pekan Raya Jakarta <3

omg, i love PRJ! hahahaha.. beneran dahh.. yang pernah maen k jakarta, atau tinggal di jakarta, atau sering mampir, don't miss jakarta fair! atau biasa namanya PRJ yaitu Pekan Raya Jakarta yang cuma ada sebulan setahun dalam rangka ngerayain ultah Jakarta, ibukota tercinta.

udah barangnya super murah (Levi's 600.000 jadi 300 000, point one dari 200.000 jadi 80.000, batik tulis cuman 80.000, komik 1000, pen 800, etc etc) pokoknya beneran rugi kalo nggak kesini! pertamanya gw kira barangnya barang lama sisa buat cuci gudang, ternyata ada juga loh yang baru, macem Levi's yang langsung nawarin model terbaru,, terus banyak laptop2 baru yang dijual dengan harga murahhh..

udah gitu, jgn lupa beli kerak telor yang berjejer cuma beda semeter sampe 30cm di beberapa area.. terus mereka berjejer sampe keluar JCC, sampe beratus-ratus meter di pinggir jalan raya, padahal udah jauh dari PRJ... g jd mikirin,,mereka yang jualan di luar JCC masi dapet omset ga ya? cuman kata bokap g, dy liat di koran, 1 tukang kerak telor biasanya serve 50 porsi per hari... masa iya?

terus ada juga yang jualan di dalem kawasan JCC nya, di outdoor yang super rame sama stand2 makanan dan mobil. smwa produk2 yang bisa dimasukin mulut ada dah d situ. susu, tebu, kacang, bakpia, mochi, wingko, mie sedap, teh tarik, popcorn, smwanya deh... oh iyah! ngga lupa juga ada American Donat! jajanan khas pekan raya!

kata bokap dan nyokap itu dari mereka masih kecil udah ada, dan terkenalnya setiap PRJ doang. soalnya kalo jaman dulu, jakarta fair itu di depan pintu masuknya pasti ada American Donat baru dibikin, masi anget2 dan wangiii..

akhirnya kita beli itu jg, walopun harganya rada mahal,,yaitu 6000 satunya, tapi kapan lagiii?? taun depan aja blm tntu g ke PRJ, atau taun depannya jg blom tntu.. akhirnya beli selusin.. tante juga nitip..

g jadi mikir.. ini donat seenak gini kenapa ngga jualan dimana2 lagii?? dan mnurut nci dan nyokap prnah buka di ambasador tapi ga laku. kalo mereka jualannya di mall malah ga laku katanya.. tp bgitu bukanya di PRJ, walopun overpriced, ttp rame ajah tuh! dan rasanya emang ngga ada duanya.. empuk, tebel, wangi, dan rasanya ga brubah dri gw masi kecill. hahahah

pokoknya PRJ the best lah.. gw dari jem 6 sampe jem 10 malem ga brasa bgt ud 4 jem muter2.. padahal itu aja kita jalann teruss.. ngga berenti2 liat2 barang2 sampe nego2 atau sampe beneran beli furniture gitu.. cman beli yang ecek2 dan cepet prosesnyaa. dan sayangnya besok harus sudah berakhir.. hiks..

kalo tau bgini, g dateng dr kmrn2 deh smpe 2-3 harii...



dan besok alain udah plg dr sf.... pasti kita bawel2an dan crita2.. dan dalam 2 hari,, it's school dayy!! omg! g even blm bs ngatur waktu tidur.. blm bli buku tulis, blm bli sgala mcem yg buat sekolah. gla men.. keasikan lburan kayaknya..




yaudah sekian deh.. g akan mencoba utk tidur. hahahahaha





cu..


xx....

days past. holiday's almost finish. *sigh*

it's gonna be school days in no time. and during these last freedom days i'm more or less doin nothing useful... sleep when the clock reach 3 am, wake up the next day around 1 pm, slowly eating breakfast, watching Taiwanese drama online, checkin e-mails, watch TV, call some friends, go out sumtimes, karaokeing, eating dinner somewhere, etc etc. and i feel nothing but emptiness. and this emptiness is seriously goin to kill me.. fml

what do i actually want??
i want to feel alive! more than anything!
i want to travel.. where? i don't know. but i want to take a rest for some days...
i want to meet people.. who? I've just met my sister from canada.. and reconnect with my childhood friends...
i want to buy things.. but what? i don't need anymore clothes, my wardrobe is sickly refusing to be closed due to those pieces which i haven't had time to wear..
i want to read.. what do i want to read?? i have a novel i haven't finished and a brand new magazine which i barely touch.
i want to eat.. what do i want to eat? i don't knoww....

so let me ask myself, what do you actually want?

i miss my friends alott... i miss talking to them, joking around..
and i'm sick of this sweet 17 party i have to organize altho i don't really want it. i'm okay without it. but for the sake of "i don't want to regret it 10 years later, wishing i had a sweet 17 party", i choose to make a happy ending for me and my dad who insisted on celebrating my sweet 17 party....

i prefer to take the money and spend it on something like homestaying, backpacking, buy a camera, or for my courses than spending it on a single party in a single night..

and how i miss my friends from PIRN..



so altho many things happened during this last week, i prefer not to tell anything. cos i don't feel anything special other than trying to find names for my alter egos. i know, sounds crazy right?

and my party's invitations turn out to be overbudget..and tomorrow i have to wake up extraearly to pick up my designer and buy the materials for my gown together...and my mom is really busy at the hospital so it'll be just the two of us.. i really wish my grandpa gets better..............





xx.

scene 1:


urgh. i want all of this to stop. like right now. at this very second.
i hate it
i hate it that life treats her unfairly. she deserves her happiness. she has endured long enough. and yet no one even realized. i wanna go to that guy and screamed on his face something like

"damn i hate you! u missed all those chances! why cant u open ur eyes and see that life is more than just about money and working and money and working? u wont die by living one day without work. damn u r so spoiled! u always blame people for ur own fault, why cant u see that the world is not just about you! there's this HUGE difference between "respected" and "self-centered".... yes u work hard, every single day. let's give those applause to you. but u never even spent a bit care of ur own family. what kind of a man would you be? u miss all the happiness, u miss life so greatly. it's not ur kids who suffer, it's you! you r a psychoworkaholicegoistic man."




scene 2:

why cant u stop complaining? life is unfair, take it or leave it.
and yet i take it..
and life has to go on..


scene 3:

I'm so sorry.
..
why did i say sorry?! its not my fault. i've warned him.more than once. i thought my attitude would have said enough. but it's not..
..
but i hurt him.
..
he said he's going to take the risk. why bother?
..
urgh! i hate talking to you. u hav no idea how many people i have hurt! i feel bad. like im the most evil person in this world. life is not a fairytale afterall..
..
it's not. thats why. he should faced the reality..
..
im such a bad person.


scene 4:

i hope grandpa will b fine..


scene 5:

end of this post

i miss PIRN so badly

huah akhirnya kembali lagi di rumah setelah seminggu d Jogja sampe ngga bisa ngmg bahasa indo jakarta sama sekali! hahahahaha!

no word can describe what i experienced deh d sana. smwanya bener2 worth it. baru kali ini seumur hidup g bener2 merasakan manfaat g belajar kalo mau ulangan, nanya2 dan berusaha merhatiin pelajaran walopun ngantuk n bosen setengah mati, kerjain tugas susa payah, kerjain laporan proyek, bikin kuisioner susah payah. manfaat yang nggak sekedar di pilih ikut lomba2, tapi manfaat ikutan sesuatu yang nggak smwa orang bisa ikut dan bener2 ngajarin banyak hal. not only about winning and losing.

tp baru kali ini beneran g rasain, g dapet 1 amazing experience d PIRN (perkemahan ilmiah remaja nasional) LIPI, ketemu orang2 dr sluruh indo, beda etnis, budaya, bahasa dari 29 provinsi, and yet.... kita semua bisa nyambung.

dan smwanya ga akan g dapetin kalo ngga pernah ngebuktiin kalo g pantes dapetin itu semua d sekolah. selama ini g lomba2, ikut ini itu, jalan2 ke berbagai tempat, ga perna ada yg se worth it ini..


singkat cerita, g bertemu dengan these wonderful people. dan kita smwa d taro d satu tempat, melakukan hal yg sama 1 minggu kcuali beda jurusan. g masuk ips, ada yg ipa n ada juga yang teknik. terus bikin kelompok, bukannya dipilihin, justru kita harus milih sendiri. baru kali ini g suru bkin kelompok sendiri dan kebingungan hrus sama siapa. (ga bole sm merlyn since kt 1 sekola). dan akhirnya g lgsg nengok k blkg.. g lgsg jdinya sekelompok sama anak2 ini, sederetan duduk di belakang g..

namanya: gangga, andri, azhar, fefy, n riri. trus ada anak yang tadi disebelah g, bru kenalan, dy jg minta sekelompok jdinya kita 1 kelompok jg. namanya Vania..

besokannya kt diskusi topik n lokasi penelitian, datanglah 1 anak lgi yg sempet d perebutin sama kelompok laen dan g bengong2 liatin tuh anak. namanya ikhsan brilianto. smwa orang tau dy, kok g ga tau?? akirnya d critain bru tau deh hehehe

abs itu kita ber 8 bikin nama kelompok. namanya De'pasto. singkatan dari Delapan pasti oke. wakakakaka. kita grup 8.
anggotanya:
-Ririe Kusumasari dari Jogja, asli'e Bali
-Agita Wijaya dari Banten
-Andri dari Bangka Belitung
-Azhar Nasih dari Jogja
-Ikhsan Brilianto dari Jogja
-Fefy Yunitasari dari Palembang
-Gangga Subroto dari Tuban, Jatim
-Vania Intar dari Surabaya








trs kita bkin penelitian d malioboro tentang pedagang2 distro n kaki lima seharian penuh muter2 malioboro wawancara orang2, ada yang baik, ada yang bru kita ngmg aja udah pergi, ada yang ga bersedia diwawancara, wah macem2 deh. desek2an panas2an.

besokannya kita ngolah laporan. huaaah! mengggilaaaa! laporan penelitian n presentasi power point yg byasanya bikin d sekolah selama setaun skrg suru bkin dalam 1 malem!!

jadi lah kita ber 8 begadang, sehari semalem. tidur bangun ganti2an demi kerjain laporan. kita stay di 1 ruangan dari jam 8 pagi sampe 8 pagi besokannya.. tidur pun d ruangan itu, kursi d dempet2in. huaah!

g sempet tidur jem 2 n bangun jem 4. abs it tidur lg, bgun jem 6. langsung mandi n sarapan..
trus bkin presentasi, santai2, tidur lg sejem, abs itu langsung latian presentasi..

sorenya kita presentasi....

trs ada acara2 fieldtrip bareng2, jalan2 k ambarrukmo plaza, naek taksi ber 8, naek transjogja, makan bareng, kemana2 bareng. omg omg.. i miss them so much now...

i miss them badly. real badly.

and it doesnt really matter that we didn't won. it doesn't matter that we were on the third place. we miss each other severely..

sampe pas malem trakhir kita smwa tulis2an pesan2, vania udah nangis2. trus ada confession dari seseorang (hihi), abis itu besok paginya jam 5.30 andri pulang, trs gangga juga. abs itu g. g tadinya nggak nangis sampe gimana2 banget, tapi bgitu giliran g yang pulang, smwanya yang tersisa pelukan dan akhirnya g juga nangis..

y ampun..
bener2 kangen..







[when i recall my memory, i laugh at an image of myself, desperately praying to God. whispering wholeheartedly "God, I've sacrificed a HUGE event of my life for LIPI, please, please God, make it worth it...."

and He smiles from above..]

Reblog and bold those you agree with!

I miss somebody right now.
I don’t watch TV these days. Well, only True Blood and Entourage on Sunday.
I wear glasses or contact lenses.
I love to play video games.
I’ve tried marijuana.
I have been in a threesome.
I have been the psycho-ex in a past relationship.
I believe honesty is usually the best policy.
I have changed a lot mentally over the last year.
I carry my knife/razor everywhere with me.
I’m TOTALLY smart. I like to believe so.
I’ve broken someone’s bones.
I’m paranoid sometimes.
I would get plastic surgery if it were 100% safe, free of cost, and scar-free.
I need money right now.
I LOVE sushi.
I talk really,really fast.
I have long hair.
I have lost money in Las Vegas.
I have at least one sibling.
I have worn fake hair/fingernails/eyelashes in the past.
I couldn’t survive without Caller ID.
I like the way i look. To an extent.
I am usually pessimistic.
I have a lot of mood swings.
I have a hidden talent.
I’m always hyper no matter how much sugar i have.
I have a lot of friends. I have my group; the less the better.
I am currently single.
I have pecked someone of the same sex.
I enjoy talking on the phone. Certain people.
I practically live in sweatpants or PJ pants. When I’m home for the day.
I love to shop. Depends.
Enjoy window shopping.
I would rather shop than eat.
I don’t hate anyone. I don’t hold grudges.
I’m a pretty good dancer.
I’m completely embarrassed to be seen with my mother.
I have a cell phone.
I believe in God.
I watch MTV on a daily basis.
I have passed out drunk in the past 6 months.
I’ve rejected someone before.
I have no idea what i want to do for the rest of my life.
I want to have children in the future.
I have changed a diaper before.
I’ve called the cops on a friend before.
I’m not allergic to anything.
I have a lot to learn.
I have been with someone at least 10 years older or younger.
I am shy around the opposite sex.
I have tried alcohol before.
I have made a move on a friend’s significant other or crush in the past.
I own the “South Park” movie.
I would die for my best friends.
I think that Pizza Hut has the best pizza.
I have used my sexuality to advance my career.
I love Michael Jackson, scandals and all.
Halloween is awesome because you get free candy.
I watch Spongebob Squarepants and i like it.
I am happy at this moment.
I’m obsessed with guys.
I study for tests most of the time.
I tie my shoelaces differently from anyone I’ve ever met.
I am comfortable with who I am right now.
I have more than just my ears pierced.
I walk barefoot wherever i can.
I have jumped off a bridge.
I love sea turtles.
I spend ridiculous money on makeup. I don’t wear makeup.
Plan on achieving a major goal/dream.
I’m proficient in a musical instrument.
I worked at McDonald’s restaurant.
I hate office jobs.
I love sci-fi movies.
I think water rules.
I went college out of state.
I like sausages.
I love kisses.
I usually like covers better than originals.
I can pick up things with my toes.
I can’t whistle.
I can move my tongue in waves, much like a snakes slither.
I have ridden/owned a horse.
I still have every journal I’ve ever written in.
I can’t stick to a diet.
I talk in my sleep.
I try to forget things by drowning them out with loads of distractions.
Climbing trees is a brilliant past-time.
I have jazz in my blood.
I wear a toe ring.
I have a tattoo.
I can’t stand at LEAST one person that i work with.
I am a caffeine junkie.
I cosplay or know what cosplaying is.
I have been to over 15 conventions.
I will collect anything, and the more nonsensical the better.
I’m an artist. Photography is an art.
I only clean my room when necessary.
I like a person of the same sex.
I love being happy.
I am an adrenaline junkie. Natural rush after runnin’.

"Take chances, take a lot of them. Because honestly, no matter where you end up and with whom, it always ends up just the way it should be. Your mistakes make you who you are. You learn and grow with each choice you make. Everything is worth it. Say how you feel, always. Be you, and be okay with it."- unknown

Don't wish for anything you don't really mean to. in case it really do come true..

something caught my eye while reading By The River Piedra I Sat Down and Wept...here's the sentence..

no one can lie, no one can hide anything, when he looks directly into someone's eyes. and any woman with the least bit of sensitivity can read the eyes of a man in love.[....] I had never dreamed that after all these years he would still remember [...] But that was so many years ago-it was another life, a life whose innocence had opened my heart to all that was good.


well, i can't bring my eyes to see those that urge me to say my feelings. the feelings which i just want to run away, saying 'i don't think i like u, sorry!' but there's a little piece in your brilliant eyes that creates another new calmer voice in my head, saying

'why don't you try? he is all about what you used to write in your "i WON'T take risk for anyone else anymore, ever! except the one that ticks all these points below.." list, isn't he? so what if he's someone you know? you expect to find a perfect-looking stranger and fall in a crazy love together, run away somewhere beautiful and never coming back? ha ha ha. very funny. enough with strangers. now, take it or leave it?'

my heart rebels against it. "but there isn't such thing. that is just a stupid insignificant list, God won't even know i write this"




-- but you know what..
God knows.
He listens.
He watches all this time..
all the pretentious laughter, forced smile, cries, tears, disappointments..He knows it all.
so my message here: Don't wish for anything you don't really mean to. in case it really do come true..