nuts night

i don't know where to start!

this last week was amazing! no other word!

freakinly AMAZING!

first, it's the Loren Cup 2008..

so Loren won in Mini soccer, female basktball, and soccer. unfortunately male basketball was won by SMAN 1( bitch!). we were so fanatic about it, we screamed and shouted until some of us lost their voice and i got this terrible sunburn on my face, but what else could I say? they lost.

but we are damn proud of our soccer team, both of them. A n B team becos they both made it to the final and they compete each other. thats so funny seein them with the same uniform and compete each other. the winner is A team (no wonder they're called the A team)

as for the closing.. wew

*speechless*

one of those wildest night of my life.

the closing ceremony (not exactly ceremony, more like party) was held in the big gymnasium hall and we barely sat down bcos every band made us wanna jump and jump and more jump. crazy..

weeeeee


unforgettable night

my feet got stepped on several times and it hurts. duh.

the freakinly crazy part was the ending, when D'cinnamons perform live on the stage and we all sang along together with our hands up in the air. (i'll show some photos l8r) and before that, we got all nuts when it was the time for the announcement of winners and we all shouted our famos yell, LOREEENNN LOREENN *clap clap clap* over and over again and the voice of us together under the roof was unbeliveably loud!LOL

and so, after several jumpings and lots of sweatings, we all sat down (again) to hear the announements of door prizes and sum funny games where the volunteers got some gift from Gogirl! magz...

and so we all shouted for D'cinnamons cos the curtains keep closing but when the MC tested some kids about their song, suddenly there was the sound of guitar playing from behind the curtains and we all stood more closely to the stage...

and slowly the curtain opened and there was the D'cinnamons!!

Dodo D'cinnamons

we all got really freak out and the rest was unforgettable cos we all sang along and waved our hand in the air.

and thats my report..

Loren Cup

another whole Loren Cup day. I finally managed to accompany Tarki GS right from the beginning til the end and they were good at the games. The female basketball lost against Strada but the soccer won against Penabur.

but it's not important..

well at least for me, the most important is that Loren soccer team won with the score 2-0, beating the Strada soccer team beautifully. and I also watched Loren male basketball team B lost in the game against Setia Bakti. hhhh... so disappointing, but I also have to admit that Setiabakti got sum skills, at least, they could score 41 balls when Loren Team B only 28.

it's quite uncomfortable and unusual for me to see so many people, dressed in different uniforms than what I wear and they wander around school areas, also there are bazaars and food stalls. but it's Lorenz Cup, isn't it? which is held once a year or maybe once every two years, well I forget but my year always got Lorenz cup every year. well..

talking bout the bazaars, there are loads of food and drink stands filled the empty space between chemistry lab and middle the stair next to ladies room. they are Okirobox, selling takoyaki, okonomiyaki, and other japanese grilled snacks, DJ fried chicken, crepes, ya kun kaya toast, daisho (sushi place! lov it!), sumo (selling ricebox), Hop Hop (bubble tea) and many others.

I actually quite proud of my school today, because all the divisions and the students are really care about the cleanliness of our school, they put posters and flyers addressing people to keep our school clean and they are so creative that they made the posters like movie posters we usually see in the cinemas telling people to throw their trashes in the dustbins and so on.


let's hope tomorrow Loren soccer team A will win and what I wait the most is that me n Desi can go out in the middle of the class because we're the LO of Tarki GS who will compete on 1 PM and I have to stand by and wait for them since 12. whew.. and this has been a tiring day!

Sency. big girls day out!

ok. this is about loren cup opening which is very very hotttt. it's like I got sunburn on my face and since I danced for the opening ceremony under the hot huge sun, I also got this terrible burnt skin on my legs. it's actually becos of the stages. the stages are from the stage we used to see in class unless there are six of them and it was damnly hot so everytime I scratch my foot or even just stand still for like 3 secs I would felt my foot burnt.

and so then we went back to our homy room, the dance room. luckily we didn't turned off the aircon so it felt like heaven after being baked in the ceremony.

in dance room. atas: kez.dot.itik. bawah: rheta, oliph, me

and so we relaxed in the dance room and we watched Loren in the first soccer game against Penabur. ad we won 3-0! hurray!

but we didn't saw the goals actually, except the first one because these 11 girls (including me) sneaked out from the school area through SD gate. and we all stopped at my house to change our clothes, washed our face, took a bath and then off to Sency (Senayan City) what a day!

and we spent this day with lots of fun! we also made crazy gang's group name. like strada gang, binus gang, Marzano gang, rodeo gang and so on (not mentioning tebu gang because i'm alone in that gang! it's all because I went to the LG by myself just to buy my favorite drink air tebuu!)

we spent this crazy day by taking lots of pictures, the craziest are the ones in Zara's lift.ckck. and b4 we all went home, we photoboxing in Timezone..wew..also, we bought this ring, we bought the same one and each of us have this ring. this simple, fungi-looking ring. but i love it!

zara's lift

and so I'm pretty tired right now..
let's take a break..and relax.

SINTING

ok, Aip hari ini benar-benar sinting, latihan dance nonstop ga berenti- berenti..

ok, bgini lah jadwal g..

pelajaran seperti biasa sampe 10.15.
10.15-10.20: makan bekel dikitt
10.20-10.45: pertemuan LO
10.45-12.15: english art (suru nyanyi satu-satu, g pake lagu I will Fly nya ten2five) trus d bagiin kaos bwt loren cup bsk.
12.15-12.50: akuntansi tapi keluar d tgh2 karena mo gladibersih dance. akirnya tukeran baju dan k aula utk gladibersih. tp karena tariannya dah lama akirnya ancurr, jd kt sempet2in ke ruang dance, ketemu Aip dolo minta d rapiin dancenya.

dan sisanya adalah kekacauan..

so, kt dance ulang dari mula sambil d rapi2in ma Aip trus baru sekitar 4 kalian d ulang, Cynchan dateng dan katanya g ma Desi d panggil gladiresik utk LO. jadi kita lari ke pinggir lapangan bola dan waktu itu gw dah dehidrasi rasanya, jd gw k kantin dolo beli minum, tarik napas, trus lari ke lapangan bola.

dan disana dah pada ngumpul para LO dan lagi diterangin gimana caranya bawa sekolah yang kita dampingin jalan ke tengah-tengah lapangan pas upacara opening. trus gw sama Desi bilang ke Bu Maria, kita bakalan dance pas lagi opening, dan sejak sekolah pertama masuk ke lapangan, dancers dah harus siap di pinggir lapangan.

yang jelas sih nggak mungkin bgt karena gw mendampingi tarki GS yang disebutnya hampir-hampir terakhir, jadi nggak bakalan sempet tukeran kostum. akhirnya utk besok sampe Opening selesai, Tarki GS di urusin LO laen, dan gw sama Desi tetep ikut dance kayak biasanya.

so...setelah pertemuan di lapangan selesai, gw dan smwanya balik lagi ke ruang dance, latian for the millionth times sampe capeee bgtttt. sampe akhirnya dah setengah 4, yang laen ambilin tas gw sama Rena, sementara gw sama Rena ke kantin supir deket pangkalan bus, beliin yang laen popmie dan aqua botol.

setelah banyak usaha pegang 6 botol aqua plus top dan dompet gw, akhirnya gw dan rena sampai di depan ruang dance. dan...OH IYA! gw blom kasih tau nyokap gw kalo gw afterskul...soooooooo gw lariiii lagi ke pintu kecil, untung disana ketemu Vlyn yang lagi naro barang n dya bawain tas gw juga. gw langsung k mbil dan ternyata yang jemput Tante Lidya, jadi nitip tas ke dya. lalu gw lari lagi sampe gedung biru dan pas sampe I said, "gw sendiri terkejut bagaimana kaki gw bisa membawa gw ke sini lagi" since I only ate in the first break, it's a miracle. lol


lalu akhirnya gw abisin TOP gw dan gw masih merasa laper secara TOP itu kecil bgt. jadi gw balik lagi ke kantin supir, beli lagi TOP sama susu coklat. eeeh pas balik, gerbangnya di gembok!!!

pas itu emang dah sepi.. akhirnya muter lewat depan gedung sampe ke pintu samping gedung biru yang deket ma ruang dance.


phewww...

akhirnya g makan dan minum dalam ruangan berAC yang nyaman...ckckck..norak bgt ga sih?
trus kita latihan dance dibawah bimbingan Aip yang amat sangat kejam karena satu salah, kita ulang lagi dari awal.
dah gitu susah bgt ga ketawa karena kt bercandaan terus dan Aip maunya kita diem klo dah duduk di bangku sebelom musiknya mule..

setelah banyak omelan, tereakan, larangan-larangan rapiin rambut dan senyum-senyum, kita boleh pulang juga. dan pas itu emang ruang dance dah harus d tutup. perjalanan dilanjutkan ke gedung ijo sambil nungguin nyokapnya Cath.


abis d jemput gw pulang ma Jeep ke rumah gw karena Jeep akan di jemput d ruma gw. jeep nitip laptop ma tas ekolah n so she went home. N I took a nice warm bath and now here I am, so damn sleepy but I can't sleep now! cos I will wake up like 3 hours later and that means no sleep till morning..


rangkuman:

INI HARI YANG SINTING

couple dance

countdown to loren cup: 3 days


iight, so, I am the leader officer. my job is to show guest soccer team and basketball team where's the court, the field, changing room, check their id card, and everything. and I also join the decoration team..

today was an ordinary very sleepy day. I don't know why, but I'm very sleepy today. I can't concentrate, and moreover, we hav this plan for couple dance only for few minutes in the middle of our modern dance moves. and we hav choose the boys, and it's ok to me.

except, there's this one problem about this boy I don't really like, and few months ago, ppl want to hook us up and I don't like him, he doesn't like me too.
so...to avoid any unwanted gossips, I refused to dance with him, I'd better dance with Daryl or Devin or Ernest, or just anyone else!

and for this Saturday, which is Lorenz cup opening ceremony with the theme "Genesis", we had this emergency plan for our dance costumes and dance moves. we had agreed to use the art performance's dance and we'll wear colorful tank top and white blouse. ok, I can't quite explain it here, hope I'll take sum pic so I can put it here.



and so, thats for today. and in an hour I'll be off to English course.


bi..

decoration and dance

another day in school...
today I helped the decoration division to decorate the stage with the theme "Alice in Wonderland"
it's so much fun that I even forgot all about my miserable love life.

on the 2nd break, I also practice dance because suddenly the opening ceremony division asked us to perform without audition at all because the audition was in December and we haven't ready yet at that time,, and so, we were panicked, because we have to perform on the basketball court! what a trauma after what had happened to us last year on Junior High's Loren Cup!
and we also panicked about the costumes, properties, which song, which dance moves we're gonna use. this is crazy! Lorenz Cup is 4 days away!

and on the project time, I got the permission to join decoration team, cutting and painting styrofoams with bread-like shape, just as in the movie!

however, my miserable love life hasn't completely gone.. it makes me lose my appetite, and I think I've dropped 1 kg because of this stupid thing. anyway, I'm quite happy to lose sum weight effortlessly. lol

I am NOT happy

I was laying on my bed when the clock strikes 12 midnight. Something slipped into my mind, something I shouldn't thought of. My mind flew to the times when I knew he has got new gf. Why should I feel something weird? like sad? or jealous?

no, I am NOT jealous! I struggled so hard not to feel that.. or maybe I'm to selfish too realized?

Ok, I am not happy. sooo not happy. I feel terribly sad. thats the truth.
I was cheering myself up by posting the last blog. at that time, I haven't came to reality that It hurts so bad and I can't stand it. I know, it looks weak, but how could I possibly forget all the things that had happened?

it's not his fault, however.
and btw, who am I? I'm not more than just an imaginary ex! someone inside his head, not in front of his eyes.

there are days where I've been thinking of the happy ending I thought we'd have. but it's just another imaginary things, and.....hhhhh...it's tiring and useless.

but I hate the reality that it has to end up like this. even just thinking bout him and his gf makes me wanna throw up with sum images I created inside my head(I was imagining them holding hands and spend their first date) and when I heard the song "love will find a way" that has just been my favorite since 2 days ago, it brought me to tears and it hurts so bad, knowing that it would never happen to me.

uhh, I'm so classic, aren't I?

I've considered feb's advice, that my happiness doesn't depend on him and I should just continue my life like before.

but when I think of it, surprisingly, I can't remember my last normal life before he came!
and Feb said I should find my own way then to forget him and build my own life. he also said to face the reality that he's so far away and all I've got the best here for now are my friends. just enjoy playing with my friends, hangin out and stuff.
I'll try...

Maybe, he's just another guy that passed by in my life. maybe he's not that worth to be waited.

but why God made those days? those days when I fall in love with him once again, when I met him through this unreal world, when he made me smile, when we spent so many times through hard and happy days, when he opened my eyes to the realities, when I taught him so many things, when we shared our favorite songs. days where we were deaf when our parents scolded us when the bills increase, days we spent so many nights without sleep just to meet, and there are days loaded with happiness and dreams and laugh. WHY?

we could have continued my life like normal one and he could continued his life miles from me. we could have not met. we could have forgot each other.. but those days happened, and it passed me by..

I know I'm not as tough as I thought I am. I never thought there will be this chapter of my life that makes me so down, mad, disappointed, very disappointed and so damn disappointed..


I've been through hard times in my life and this isn't the worst, but one of the most terrible one...

smile : )

Just today, I heard this relieving news. and I really fully truly realized what's the meaning of "God knows the best" because just a few minutes ago I heard this news, about someone I really afraid to lose but wanna lose him so much at the same time. I wanna be free from that confusing feeling and now I truly have!

He has made his choice and i respect that. and now I feel happier than before..

ugh..

ok it's not that happy but I feel relieved. a huge swoosh of relieve. although that means losing him forever and there's this part inside my heart that feels something. more like sad, very sad. but I'm happy at the same time. I CAN'T DESCRIBE IT

I can't stop smiling for no reason. God, I'm not crazy right?
I smile for my loss
and smile for my happiness.
and smile for my celebration
and for my silent tears
for my feelings I had for years
and for the freedom I got.




let's call it a blessing.


cheers..

I confused myself too

I've been thinking a lot lately about my feelings and stuff and it's not an easy work, because I'm quite sensitive about my feelings but I don't know what I'd do. I have suffered this strange midair feeling for like 2 years and now I think it's been better cos that feeling got weaker and weaker until finally I think I almost free myself from it.

I know it's confusing, I confused myself too. It's an uncertain thing I couldn't say. there are only few words can describe it: love, miss, friendship. and it goes round and round that 3 words which I can't choose which one is which.

I once loved this guy and we've broken up quite long ago. and since then this feeling started. maybe it's because of that broke up thingie. it's not that I'm sad or losing and missing him, it's more like "it's not right! we shouldn't have broke up and we shouldn't have started this relationship!" cos now it gets more and more complicated for me. not for him.

I miss him like loads, like friends, not lover. and I know I still had my feelings midair, I want to be separated from this feeling but it has tied me the moment I started this ridiculous relationship. he's my friend and I like him. I once loved him but not anymore. and this feeling changes time to time, friends, love, friends, love, friends, love. why? because he himself isn't sure about his feelings too!

stupid bloody guy!

and I've ended this feeling, starting from NOW!
promise!


I'd love him as friend and thats all.

PHEW to my report card!

Phewwwwww....

lots and lots of PHEW to my report card..

orite..so, I finally achieve my target that my average score would be 80 at least. and then today, I got the report card and the total score is 1201 which if we divide by 15 subjects, the total is 80!

Thanks God.

and today I received my tes bakat result, and it turns out that I will be more capable in Social!
OMG OMG OMG.
not science!
and it means I have to be separated from my friends, bcos they all recommended for Science! and im social! alone!

but another thing is, it also says that if I want to enter science that would be ok too. but you know, the tes bakat result really put my mood down, because like it or not, that's the fact, that I'm recommended for social, and I can't just ignore that result right? there's a part of me saying that social would be better for me, but I want both! and another thing is that my friends are all sciency, and i'm pretty much sciency too!

ok, not that sciency, but I want science! I want to be with my friends.
I kno evrybody says not to follow friends. and i'm quite sure I can stand on my own. social isn't that bad right?

so, in recess time, I'll possibly spend it with my friends, and in class, with my social friend. rite..thats easy..

about my IQ? hmm. let's not talk about it. it's not that good ok?

go on, to the right now mood.
I feel really tired because of dance practice, nonstop one..and I also feel safe and secure inside my house, back again to my computer, and my stomach's full...
I love the moment like this, when I just feel alright and safe..

What a day!

What a day!

today, 11th January I felt really, really happy!
not just because of the Lion King 2 film I watched in English Art subject (addicted to the "love will find a way" song), but also because today I danced in the xkul time.

moreover, I got this really cute gift from my old friend, I love it!
first time I got it, I was confused of what can this thing do, because it said in the box that it's a robot, I thought it could laugh when I tickle or walk if I clap, but then I know its head and hands can turn and there's a also the small ice cream to hold in its hand.

The cute dunny. lov it!

and then after school, I went to my mandarin course and in a few minutes I'll be off to english course. phew!

another big thing: tomorrow I'll receive my 1st semester report card and my "tes bakat" result.. omg omg omg omg.
I'll be off to school at 8 am and practice dancing with my friends first thing and then i'll go to my class and wait for my turn to take the report card. Hope Ms.Maria doesn't tell my mum that im talkative or sum kind of bad things but hopefully when I got my mid semester report card she said I'm "active"! not talkative! mind u..

Andrea Hirata bewitched me

I've read Andrea Hirata's book titled, Edensor.
I know it's a bit old cos it has been published in several times and you know what, i think it's freakin amazing!


When I read it, i was like...WOW! this man's crazy! he traveled all those countries in europe to make his dreams come true. so this story started from the first book (there are 4 books) which titled Laskar Pelangi that told me about his childhood in Belitung, growing up as a poor kid, got the best of his friendships, knowing lots of great friends that has their own characters and that book teach me about the importance of friendship, spirits, and the realities in my own country.


The 2nd book titled Sang Pemimpi is about his adventure with his distance cousin, Arai and his another friend, Jimbron. and once again Andrea successfully enchanted me by his choice of words and the good story about his dream to go to Paris, exploring Europe till he reach Africa. and he struggled for that! he went to Jakarta and was totally lost, no money and no job. and finally he got this scholarship from unieropa and with Arai, they both together went to Paris to continue their education.

Fortunately somehow, Arai and Andrea were put in the same university and in the 3rd book titled Edensor, it told me about Andrea's adventure, traveled as a backpacker with Arai. they collect money by their street performance as mermaids and they got heaps of adventures and experiences. from searching A ling (Andrea's childhood first love) until he finally reach Edensor, the village in his dreams for years....


wew.. i was so touched!


I wish someday I could make that kind of book!

it's 2008 and I think nothing's changed

guess it's 2008 already. I can't believe it's so fast!
I mean look at us, we have to run to get our steps with the time.

it seems just like yesterday, all the chaos, all the fun, all the laugh I had in 2007 or years before. But now, here I am, 15 years old, high school girl. wew! I guess the pressure is high isnt it? ok, so in this 2008, I HAVE to struggle harder in order to enter science, not social. I dont mean anything with that, I love social too, I even think of entering it too but I dont think I will make it the best option. so, 11th grade is where we all, the 10th graders, have to choose which path ill we go. is it social, or science.

the thing is, In social, we won't learn any frantic biological thingies or chemical bonds and we don;t have to count how many seconds a ball needs to get back on earth and blah blah blah.
so....we eliminated those things from my highschool life. but then...let's see things wider, I WANT to know what happen in my body when I grows up, I wanna know why some plants grows to the way where the sun rises and I won't get that in social!


and If I finally go to science, let's see...I wont deal with those mathematical economy or accountancy, I don't have to think about what's max weber's theory or what aguste comte said. but I will miss it!
I wanna get those knowledge, all the knowledges about how people react to one another, what's its name, how to make an accountancy charts and what's economy teach me.


let's get this clean, I wanna get both and I dont wanna get both at the same time..

so I still don't know what I actually want!


let's forget about those sciency and socialy stuffs.


now, here is 2008 and I think I got left behind with the time. I don't know what happenned to me in 2007 and suddenly, WHOOSH! it's 2008!
it means, new year! new spirit, new hopes, or at least that's what the books said. but I don't feel like it, do you?

It's like, Ok, I will be having this routines as a students, study for some tests, go out with sum friends, and that's it! life's going round and round like that! I want to get somethin new but of course I can't leave school. I want to explore new places, new abilities in myself, I wanna get all the things this world offers to me. my life isn't just about schools and paperworks and malls and cars and...uggghh..im lecturing right now! cos I'm damnly bored! I wanna get new things in 2008, but how?


ok, sometimes things arent going as well as I wish, but thats ok. I can deal with that. and sometimes there are somethings new in my life. like about 2 years ago, I happened to meet my old friends through friendster and MSN. And from that time on, we keep on contact each other like every weekends. and when my sisters came back from canada, we got heaps of fun, yes we are! but then, after 2 whole months, they got back to canada and we're goin through our daily things again, over and over and over.

Sunny Tuesday

So, today is Tuesday and the sun is sooo bright. right from the beginning of the day till now, it's almost 6 pm but it's still bright outside.

today, we had this christmas celebration and my class weren't ready yet, so u kno, it's a lil bit of mess. we sing and dance and do lil drama but it didnt go smoothly. well, never mind.

but today, the point is, i didnt study at all the whole day!
after the christmas celebration, we continued to the class gathering. we swap presents and ate pizzas, isnt that amazing?


and now my head's a lil bit dizzy. im so sleepy but I didn't feels like I wanna go to bed. Me n my friend is talking about my plan to Korea right now and he still told me his story about his europe tour. I suggest him to go together in the tour to Korea, but he thinks it's not possible but he wants to show me this girl he met in his europe tour, he said I look like her. but after I saw her pic, No way! we dont look alike in every way!

well, in some ways at least.
but the point is, I dont feels like I resembles her.


Ok, and now I'm thinking about my Thursday this week. we got this holiday and me n my friends have arranged some plans but it keeps changing and we still dont know where to go. forst, we have this plan to try riding a transjakarta bus that we havent try, but then we also want to watch DVD in Oliv's house, but she said she might be going sumwhere with her mom, and it change again to Dede's house, no transjakarta, but the point is, we want to "open forums". what I mean is, nonetheless, gossiping.

not exactly gossiping actually, I hate hating people for some evil words, but we actually PREDICT the future. lol. like who this girl will going out with, or will this boy ask his dream girl out, or even, will one of us get asked out by a guy, kind of that thing.


this group officially consist of 14 girls and turn to more or less 26 kids, all boys and girls if there's a birthday celebration in a restaurants. this 14 girls work so hard to achieve high scores and we balance those hard works with some treats like what we're planning right now. just to deserve us some rights, not wasting money..

Blueberries

This is my own blog...sooo...I guess im free to write anything I want. I dont care bou grammars or spelling as long as it represents the way im feeling or thinking.

so.. Blueberries..

I LOVE Blueberry Muffin.
First time I taste it (the one from bread talk) it makes my swoon and I want more!
I can eat blueberry muffins for a day, I won't get bored.

since that day, I start to buy blueberry muffin every time me n my mum go to Bread Talk. and if we go to other bakery, I will choose anything with blueberry, blueberry cake, blueberry mountain or whatever the name is.